it sucks.and i miss you guys

so i dint sleep for the whole night yet again.well i plan to go to sleep tdi,but then i just got a text from my brother and ask me to go skype.so i did,but i then i was waiting in vain.HAHAH.after an hour of waiting baruth ada.so talked like we always do.then when hang up my other brother calls well i dint talk much as we wer both busy with our own stuff.

chat with my 2 cousins and they wer showing off about their tour to old trafford.bitch much,cheeko you dnt even like man u.good thing you bought me something.mun nda ill hate you fr the rest of my life as you wer being an anoying girl who keeps on saying this "told you,but you dont wana listen.i told you to stay with us,but noooo you went back to brunei instead"

i guess people ths days,they just wana mess up with your minds and play a lil bit of game.are you trying to pay back?bring it,i guess i deserve it anyway.HAHA

"if thats the way you play it,well bring it.cus ill play it even better."

i cant sleep,and im bored

i got nothing to do and im the only one whos wide awake so might as well blog.

ive been very busy lately since raya is coming up soon.since i got back frm my uk i always stay up for the whole night and sleep in th morning.

hows puasa treating me?well its fine so far since i spend alot of time with my family.and thres just alot of family gatherings,wich means that i can hang out with my oh so bestest cousins and gossip.too bad ramadhan is almost over.

i think raya's gona be boring since my 2 brothers nada,and we wont be going out that much.i dont realy think goinng to tutong this year is gona be that fun,and this is gona be the first raya without nene.how sad,i miss her so much.and what makes raya boring is becus most of my cousins is not in brunei.should have just stayed in uk with my aunts,but then ill miss all the people way back in brunei.

its been 3 days straight that im on the phone with khairi,since i cant sleep at night time and for every phone call we made,we always argue over some silly stuff.wich is kinda funney and stupid at times.

i bet later its gona be fun i hope but then i have to wake up in the mornin to go to tutong to pick my baju kurong.then i have to help to move around the furniture and clean the house.thats fun,seriously!you know family bonding.HAHAH.then i have to go to kubur and maybe out fr sungkai with all the families.

i have a new maid and shes so funney.and i notice lately i dont feel like texting people maybe its becus im just to tired or im just tooo lazy.oh well

i miss all the people in uk and my bestest friends and KHAIRI

i just wasted you time telling you all this.

- its khairi that i love.

my days without you guys

like i said i just got back from my "holiday".well i was away for 12 days pulang saja,i think but it feels like ages!i still cant go to sleep.jetlagged i guess.

i really miss khairi when i was away.you know since we dint chat or text or whatever.pokoknya nada contact.okay thats weird.

when i was away i really wanted to go online like so badly and i wan check peoples blog you know since syaza always text me about ppl blog but sadly i cant.where i live,the conection sucks big times.

i really wanted to tell him on how much i miss him and LOVE him.ahhah.well i did text but no reply,i wasnt expecting a reply tho knowing already that he wont reply.long story.but atleast i still can tet with syaza.thats a good thing,texting with her realy helps to make your day brighter.okay i sound so gay.hahha.but yeah

i really miss all the people wa back in brunei.and my dad alwas calls me like 24-7.okay im jus exagerating but he calls everyday saying that he misses me.but yeah no offence but i miss my sibs more,i thnk its becus im use to it sudah.you know my parents being away,yeah im use to that udah since i was a lil kid.but i just cant stand not being with my sibs.

well i really misses my bestfriend,boyfriend,dad,sibs you name it.omg i cant imagine going there december for the whole month.lagi tah.but yeahhh,whatever

yeay brunei!

i just got back like 2 days ago i think and i realy dont feel like bloging and i planned to stop blogging,but yeah the boyfirend asked me to blog about my boring life.okay,im just gona make it short as its already late and i have a boyfriend to chat with.

syaza came to my place today,i was very sleepy and tired that time as i dint sleep for the whole night.but was glad that she came as i miss her alot and you know we need to update and gossip.and i told her about that weiirdest,yuckiest dream of my you know and she gt the same imperssion about it too.then she had to go back home and then i took my phone and reply khairi's msg and he was moody,i dont know why.i dnt wana get affected,you know being moody too so i took my nap as i was so tired.hey dont get me wrong,you know that feeling when someone is moody youll get moody too.you know!

my mom wokee me up and i gt lectured since i havent showerd and all.and then gt ready and went straight away to the airport to send my oh so bestest friend.my brother that is.hugged my brother and cried.he said this to me and made me cry even more "cry nel,cry.nda jua papa tu,december jumpa lagi.and ill miss you and i love you"

went back home,and my mom and aunt was so bissing in the car,well its really funey tho.went back home and continue gossipping with my cusin.banyak dosa aku buat.played badil for sekajap then msging with my boyfriend.and here i am chatting and blogging

happy 3 months i guess
-i love khairi.and i miss rachelle
nadh happy 15 months.

a conversation

im at syazas tution place now,and theres this twins we know from there jua, aziz and azri.
we were being random when suddely aziz ask us this
aziz: "do you guys like to take a pictures of yourself?"
me & syaza: "mestilah,were girls kali ah.kenapa?dont you?
aziz: "ndalah!"
me & syaza: "memanglah cus your a guy."
azra: "uhh,babi what does that made me?a gay?"
me,syaza and aziz :"HAHAHAH"

it was so funney considering that azri is the only guy who takes tons of pictures of him self kalah perempuan.HAHA.nadawah zri jangan kau marah.we still love you eventhough your sometimes a gay when you take a pictures of yourself.

im so gona MISS my oh so favorite best twins when im flying off later.

twins you guys better text me up everyday mun nda kami putus.*inside joke* and that goes to syaza tooo.


-sharki is out.

i love you boyfriend!

-xoxo

i did this for you

so like i said ill continue on blogging.i said earlier that school was great.wait,im not trying to be mean or something but yeah i have to let it out.everyday i ALWAYS smell this very funney smell that i cant stand it wich always gve me a major headache.okay im just exagerating.but its true,you dont belive me?well siapa jua tahan?wait ada org tahan cus their just imune to that smell sudah.

i have a funney friends,who is living up a fairy tale life,they even have their own fairy tale friends.HAHA.you know who you are.nadawah.

i realize that everyone is using the word "much" these days. I think its the season.but i know that i dont use it no more,or maybe i doo but sometimes cus thats not how i roll.=p

my aunt just got me a bracelet and i bet "its mahal tu".HAHA.okay i seriously need to stop.

so i better get going now as i have a boyfriend to chat too and i need to pack for tomorrow

PAPAI everyone.

i hate goodbyes?does papai counts?

khairi its you that i love so much.

it starts with an A

school was great,but i really miss rachelle and im flying off tomorrow.how boring.

yesterday i went to a jewelery shop with them zainul and all.they wanted to buy me this necklace but i know it was expensive and i know they were joking around so i just went away.for that small piece of neclace it cost like a thousand plus but it was pretty tho.ill just ask my mom to buy me that necklace.it was so funney when zainul said this to the sales person "ni kan balikan c alai ah" and the sales person thot that he was being serious.oh welll

OMG!i just realize that im turning into those people.i dont have a life now.

okay im gona take a nap,then watch gossip girl.soo ill continue on blogging later probly at night.

so papai for now and im still thinking of a pet name for someone.

ps:- i miss where me,syaza and rachelle would spend almost the whole day together.

"theres just something special about you that i love so much"

a start without you?

so i just got back.and i was glad that i went out with nadh and all.i was supose to go to my uncles place but they went without me.

i was very happy that i went out today as i have updated myself with some stories and all.however it came to a point where he told me almost everything and i was all moody tarus.i realize that i always trust people eventhough sometimes i know in my heart that they cant be trusted.oh well thats just who i am.

and im gona start a life without you,its over between us,i dont thinkwe can be the same as before.with you its always the same cus your never gona change eventhough you told me like a milion times on how your trying your best to change.i guess its true that people never change cus its easier that way.you always bring up all the stupid stuff we have done and you always blame me for it.maybe if your ever gona change maybe we could be better but so far i think its imposible as your just sitting there without doing a thing about it.and whats worse is i have to know this from other people.oh common!-you know who you are

hey does this ring a bell "we better teach that girl a lesson".but i think ill pass

"youre better off without them"-iuBHI

im gona quote something everyday

so today,school was great but rachelle dint came to school.well we pretty much gossip about alot of people.well thats not new.and i was all being racist and all.lets skip that

so went back home and my dad was very pissed and my brother as he frgt to pick me and my sister up.i think its the "crying season" apakan?well i realize that everyday mesti ada orang menagis.

i took my nap.HAHA.and woke up around 6.then after sungkai i was so bored so i played cs and wrote a letter to my dad,sibs and mummy.it was all bida as its in malay.i mean standard malay.well it was fun and everyone replied my letter.

i better get going now as i gt alot of letters to reply.

"theres no magic in sucess"-dad

i was all emo

i cried 2 days in a row.not something to be proud off but atleast unlike some people who cried EVERY SINGLE DAY.

so my "bestest friend" came to my place yesterday.and he asked me to update myself,well he always say that whenever he thinks that i have something in my mind.

so i was letting it all out and i came to realize where i always blame people for the stuff i made.so i wana say sorry to all of you.but i try my best to change,but if i cant then im doing this my way.
im realy glad i had that talk as it open up my mind.he said "you know theres other people you should talk to kan?and you are gona tell kan?"-yeah i am,but ill wait for the perfect time.

after talking that much my tears just burst out and so he was talking about all his feelings and he cried.AWW.well i feel bad for saying this to him "bida jua kau ani eh,typical guys.they just cant move on with life" then he said with tears in his eyes "sanag sja kau ckp.atleast your still friends with all of them"


aBHO "hey thanks for leaving me,cause i almost love you forever"

and again you'll waste a time of your life readng this

okay im extremly bored.i dont know why but i feel like writting something as i got nothing to do.well ada wich is chatting but now we got nothing to chat about.

as always i love saturdays,as its a family day and we always have people over to our house.so thats a good thing.plus my driver is coming back tomorow wich is a good news cus i miss him.now his back i can go anywhere.

ive been kinda busy this past few days cus i have to accompany my mom everywhere.well my dad is back!and thats another good news.

im looking forward for monday as im going out with them nad,its been ages now.the last time i saw her was july.OMG! i seriously need to see her and update myself.i rember going to her place like almost everday.good old times.

im also looking forward for tuesday cus gossip girl and one tree hil new episode is out.so yeah life gets even more perfect.

what im not looking forward is going to uk on the 11th
the reason for me not wana go there is because:-
1.im gonna miss my friends
2.im gonna miss my brother and sister and dad.
3.im not able to hang out that much with my brother as his gona fly back off to uk on th 24th
4.im gonna miss abg dens birthday.

the reason why i wana go there:-
1.mom ask me to accompany her to send off my other brother
2.i need to shop.

i just wasted a time of your ife as you read this

i dint go to school today and decided to go to nads house as i miss her alot plus im flying off soon but then i was told to stay at home*sigh

so i was watching greys anatomy with my brother.

i know that everyone hav their secrets,

i got this from greys anatomy from meredith "people forget how good it can feel when you finally set secrets free. Whether good or bad, at least they're out in the open. And once your secrets are out in the open, you don't have to hide behind them anymore. The problem with secrets is even when you think you're in control, you're not."

i do agree with this but somehow i dont think its really a good thing to do,wel atleast for now.but hey i plan to tell the whole world about it someday when im ready.really if you keep all the things bottled up its a pain in the ass.